We regret to inform you that you are hereby banned from this evening's Unbirthday party at the Unbirthday Manor in Underland. As you are aware, our members are promised that no non-unbirthday persons shall be allowed on the premises, and, regretfully, we must uphold our promises and traditions. We ask for your understanding and cooperation in this matter.
However, we look forward to admitting you back on the premises for the morrow's party, so please, don't do anything drastic in your depression, such as, but not limited to he following: suicide, over-dosing, self-injury, or other such activities which would incapacitate yourself. We do, however, highly encourage you to surround yourself with the others who won't be joining us for the evening, so that you will not fall to despair.
Thank you, and good day.
Magical Trevor, President of The Unbirthday Society
(Posting it here instead of your profile because I'm different. Yay! )
(I wanted to make sure they'd see the comment, and since everyone else posts on the profile, I post mine elsewhere, so that if they just delete the mass comment thing on their profile, they'll still see this, and hopefully smile a little bit, whether due to it being funny or stupid, I don't care. I just want to make them smile.)
... No, I was just making the ellipses even longer by adding a space between the three dots. I wasn't saying to * yourself, or something like that. (I should have said ". . . to you too!" instead. Sorry. Re-reading it, I can see why you would think I was cursing you instead. )